Wildpaw Puppet Pals in: Warrior Swears
This is a parody on: Wizard Swears by The Potter Puppet Pals. -- Wolffur ______________________________________________________________________________________________ *Wildpaw and Autumnpaw are laying under the fresh-kill tree, with nothing to do* *Jaypaw walks toward them* Jaypaw: Hey guys, Sunstar told me a list of words that are banned from WildClan! I didn't know warriors had swears! Wildpaw: Of course they do, Jaypaw! They are called Warrior Swears! Autumnpaw: Oh, like Kittypet Hunter! Jaypaw: Really? That's adorable! Wildpaw: Oh, there worse then that! Read some, Jaypaw! Jaypaw: Let's see... Son Of A Fox! That's useful! Wildpaw: My favorite is Pounce And Bite! Birchfur: Eh hem hem... Did I detect foul mouthingness? Wildpaw: Oh no! Birch- Jaypaw: Goldpaw's Kittypet Food! Birchfur: Excuse me? Wildpaw: Jaypaw! *Bite Jaypaw* Birchfur: I refuse to have this crowfood spewed in my presence, Jaypaw. 500,000 extra training sessions for you and your friends! *Pause* Autumnpaw: Badger Boogies! *Everybody looks at Autumnpaw* Jaypaw: Everybody run! *Shouts at Birchfur* Expecto Kittypet! Birchfur: *Sighs* Crowfood Rousers! *Apprentices are giggling* Jaypaw: That was fun! Oh, hi Eaglepaw! Eaglepaw: Oh, hi Jaypaw, Wildpaw and Autumnpaw! What's up, guys? Autumnpaw: We're saying naughty words like Jiggle The Voles! *Eaglepaw gasps* Eaglepaw: My mom forbids me for saying naughty words! Jaypaw: Well, your mom is a Grumpy Badger! *Eaglepaw gasps again* Wildpaw: Don't worry, Eaglepaw! Jaypaw is just trying out some Warrior Swears! Jaypaw: I mean every word I ever say ever, because I’m *Pause* Jaypaw! *Sound of thunder in the background* Eaglepaw: I’m telling Sunstar! Autumnpaw: You’re such a Mouse-head! Eaglepaw: But this is against the Warrior Code! Jaypaw: I can’t let you do this, Eaglepaw! Eaglepaw: Oh no, no, no. I don’t like to swear. My mom doesn’t like me to swear... Jaypaw: Are you a WildClan cat or not, Eaglepaw? Eaglepaw: I am a WildClan cat. Bu-bu-... Jaypaw: Try it then. Here’s the list. Say anything. *Whispers list* Wildpaw: Come on, Eaglepaw! Do it. Nevile: S-Silv-verstripe's C-Claws! *Autumnpaw and Wildpaw cheer* Jaypaw: You sicken’ me! Eaglepaw: But... But... It’s on the list! Jaypaw: Silverstripe is more the tom then you’ll ever be, Eaglepaw! *Eaglepaw sighs* Jaypaw: Leave and never return to WildClan again ever, Eaglepaw! *Eaglepaw starts wailing and walks away (Autumnpaw and Wildpaw cheer in joy) Wildpaw: You’re quite the tom today, Jaypaw! Autumnpaw: Yeah! You’re full with tomish attitude! Jaypaw: Hey! Let's irritate someone! *The apprentices sneak toward Scratchclaw* Scratchclaw: Hey! Who's there? Jaypaw: Badger Urine! *Jaypaw, Wildpaw, and Autumnpaw giggle silently* Scratchclaw: What? If I ever find out who’s talking to me, I will make sure you will get exiled! And I will kill you! *Birchfur and Sunstar walks toward the apprentices* *Autumnpaw, Jaypaw and Wildpaw gasp* Sunstar: Birchfur would like to have a word with you, apprentices. Wildpaw: Oh, Fish Scales! Birchfur: That is exactly the sort of crowfood that I want to ban, from the distinguished trees and leaves of WildClan territory. The traditions of the Clan must be up-held, and respected. The founder surly wil- Jaypaw: You’re a Kittypet *Beep* And a Loner *Beep* mixed together, Birchfur! Birchfur: What?!?!?!?!? Jaypaw: You Floppy Wandering Kittypet Fighter! *Everyone looks at Jaypaw* *A long pause from everyone* Autumnpaw: Rabbit Full Maggots! Birchfur: Sunstar, I urge you to exile these monsters! Sunstar: Nah Birchfur. Let them have their fun. Birchfur: But you the one who banned the words in the first place! Sunstar: I don’t even remember five heartbeats ago. Back to order patrols. *Birchfur walks away growling* Wildpaw: Thank you so much, Sunstar! Sunstar: Alas! Your welcome! Jaypaw: Sunstar, your older then StarClan, right? Sunstar: Why, Yes. Jaypaw: Do you know any, super ancient, lost to the ages, archaic, olden times Warrior Swears? Sunstar: Eh, well there is one. Autumnpaw: I want to hear it! Sunstar: The StarClan Swear. (Mystical music starts playing) Sunstar: You must promise to never repeat it to anyone! Wildpaw: We won’t, Sunstar! Sunstar: Here it is. *Takes a deep breath* Your Mother Is A *beep beep beeping beep* Kittypet *beep beep beep* And Loner *beep beep beep beep* Mixed Together *beep beep beep beep beep beep* And A Big Mistake Of StarClan *beep beep beep beep beep beep* A Kittypet Fighter *beep beep beep* And Kittypet Hunter *beep beep beep beep* And A Floppy Wandering *beep beep beep beep beep* Rabbit Full Maggots*beep beep beep beep beep* Badger Urine *beep beep beep* Twoleg Loving *beep beep* Warrior Code Breaker *beep beep* And *beep beep beep beep beep* A *beep beep beep beep beep* Mouse-head! *Everyone freezes* *Sunstar sighs, and gasps for air* Autumnpaw: Wo-o-o-ow! Sunstar: Now, you know. You must never ever repeat it, okay? (Mystical music starts up again) Jaypaw: We promise. *Eaglepaw walks toward Wildpaw, Autumnpaw and Jaypaw* *Pause* Autumnpaw, Jaypaw and Wildpaw: Your Mother Is A *beep beep beeping beep* Kittypet *beep beep beep* And Loner *beep beep beep beep* Mixed Together *beep beep beep beep beep beep* And A Big Mistake Of StarClan *beep beep beep beep beep beep* A Kittypet Fighter *beep beep beep*..... Category:Wolfy's Fanfictions